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What About the Other 90%??

If a woman is on her back 10% of the time, what is a man bringing the other 90% of the time? But, don’t judge a book by it’s cover. This book provides tools for women to deal with the undertow that undermines the very thing they say they want.

By Chanda R. Mitchell

EBOOK/ISBN-ISBN-13: 978-0615739328
USD: $14.99/CAD: $17.99

ON SALE: April 1, 2021GENRE: Nonfiction/Personal Growth/Self-Improvement/Spiritual Growth



Because uncomfortable as a break up can be, commitments frequently stop once and for all reason—especially

Strategy to perform the second your time across right.

whenever one or both people become miserable most of the time, and you’d much better off satisfying some body newer. On more rare opportunities, lingering emotions for an ex are very solid that “rekindling things” doesn’t fairly identify it, simply because that fire never went out. Actually a lot of seemingly-rock-solid movie star marriages are preceded by a brief separate: Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard, Adam Levine and Behati Prinsloo and Gabrielle Union and Dwyane sort, to name just a couple of.

Reconciliations might help down, it is they suitable for your circumstance? Learn some professional advice on things to ask while you are contemplating fixing your relationship with an ex.

Could be the principal concern that caused your apart resolvable?

“The number one requirement that must be satisfied is the fact things is different,” says psychologist Cortney Warren, PhD. “there’s a good reason that union did not work the last energy you dated—maybe many reasons. What they comprise contributed to your very own earlier break up. Thus, whether it is visiting work these times, one or both individuals needs changed.”

“Unless these people fix just what scenario was actually that broke these people around get started with, it’s simply going to take place continuously,” claims romance expert Rachel A. Sussman, LCSW, mentioning feasible distinctions just like religion or willing to relocate off for a career.

Do you really both acknowledge exactly what your recent variance comprise?

To exercise the issues that caused the break up, one should decide on precisely what those harm happened to be to start with. Breakdown to do this brings the reunion getaway course to a screeching prevent weekly, monthly, or 60 days in, claims Sussman.

“the happy couple should have an exceptionally excellent conversation,” she persists. “they must has a real perception of the story of exactly what smashed these people up. They ought to be about the same page about this story, and additionally they must certanly be on the same page in regards to what ought to change.”

Possibly you have furnished each other enough space recognize simple tips to do things best this time around?

Do not also look at fixing the relationship unless you’ve furnished your split some space to breathe, Sussman cautions. “gets the few experienced time during that split to reveal and change, as well as work with by themselves?” she asks. “That partners has an increased probability of performing it out compared to pair whom just split for 14 days and simply becomes back together again out of anxiety, loneliness, and the wrong grounds.”

Is your ex ready to accept fixing the relationship?

This absolutely will likely go without claiming, but exploring the risk of reconciliation requires to be mutual. Lots of films portray the hero as “persistent” and “romantic” as he’s truly exhibiting stalking manners, that Atlantic information shows, when in real-life, demands like “don’t call me once again” must be taken heed of.

Should you choose wish broach the topic, Sussman recommends contacting determine if might open to speaking about it. “it is good to take responsibility, state ‘Hey, I’ve prepared plenty of soul searching but’ve enjoyed goof ups that we manufactured, i’d really like the chance to talk to your,'” she claims. “which means you’re maybe not seeking nothing face-to-face, just enjoy what they have to express. I do think that is certainly often a good possibility to get private obligations.”

Are you scared you may not discover some other person?

This can be some of those previously mentioned incorrect excellent reasons to reunite, states Sussman: “It really is fear. Concern with are by yourself, anxiety about never meeting anyone, fear that it would be the previous possibility they may has, concern with a relationship.” Asking yourself should you’ll ever select a match after an enchanting dissatisfaction is completely clear. But that worry should not tips the options.

Will you ask your ex the tough concerns?

This is exactly especially critical if they are the one initiating a reconciliation, or they’ve discouraged and injured an individual continuously in the past. “you could be skeptical,” Sussman states, requesting them items like, ‘what makes you consider it will be different that time? Why must I believe one? How can I realize you’re going to be constant in what your claiming?'”

Warren provide some: “what exactly is various about about what you do now that is likely to make our romance function now? And what is it you may need from us to get this to succeed that you did not become last experience most of us out dated?”

Have you ever conveniently forgotten the dark elements of your very own union?

Get a cold-eyed inventory of your respective connection. Managed to do the happier occasions truly outnumber the distressing kinds?

sugar daddies

“human beings usually look backward on an ex with rose-tinted specs and don’t forget precisely the positive aspects of union,” Warren talks about. “For many individuals, we all precisely bear in mind only that which was good about an ex and former romance since the bad components of the partnership that pennyless us all up are way too unpleasant or distressing to put on in the aware consciousness.” Versus scrolling through older selfies people two on a tropical trip, you could possibly decide to try checking the transcripts—aka, their aged e-mails and words exchanges—to much better revisit precisely what abstraction had been truly similar.

“If it was a relationship when the close outweighs the bad, I would generally be challenged to inquire, ‘why not get back together?,'” Sussman states. “I have seen lovers exercise, and go right ahead and put wedded, and keep wedded. It could actually come about.”

What About the Other 90%??

What's Inside?

  • An understanding of why women choose the men they choose
  • The purpose for which a woman was created
  • A little about Chanda’s life
  • Insight into the basic needs of a woman
  • How powerful a man can be in a woman’s life


When Chanda Mitchell told me that she was going to write a book on the 90% that women are missing out on from men, I was intrigued by the title, “What About the Other 90%?” I thought the title was extremely thought provoking and the question needed to be asked and addressed and answered and not by a man but by another woman who’s been living it out in real time.

In our society we desperately need women authors to rise up and speak to the heart of where their readers live through every day and bring answers to the table that make sense.

Wray Wade
City Council Member at City of Longview

Ms. Mitchell was a welcoming addition to my media team during my re-election campaign for Longview City Council. Most recently she assisted me with interviews with a local television station, which went incredibly well.

Haley Brooke Griffin
Owner of DuBeck& Co

Awesome program! They really helped me with business ideas and even gained business for me. Great experience with Momentum Builders, LLC..

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ADDRESS, PO Box 6453, Longview, TX 75608